Is it correct to discuss with a child which does not want to have sex about the reasons why it does not want? Or is it necessary to accept the "no" of a child without any discussion?
The main argument against a discussion is that the child does not have an equal position in such a discussion. It may agree with the arguments of the adult even if it does not want sex, because it has not enough arguments.
Another related problem is that many adults use "discussion with a child" as a synonym for pressure on the child. Many parents, teachers and so on often "discuss" something with children, but the end of this discussion is predefined - the child has to agree with the adult position. A discussion where the end is not predefined and where the position of the child will be taken seriously by the adult is an unknown experience for many children. Thus, there may be already a fixed pattern in the mind of the child - he wants to "discuss" it means I have to do it.
These problems are usually much greater in relations with girls compared with boys. Girls often tend to avoid discussions and to agree with things they don't like, while boys often defend their position even under high pressure. But these things depend on the upbringing and are only statistics. That means, a concrete boy may also agree with behaviour he doesn't like, while a concrete girl may defend his position.
On the other hand, there are also arguments for discussing. At first, knowing about the possible problems, the pedophile can avoid them successfully. He has to teach the child that at least in a discussion with him the child's arguments will be taken seriously and that it is not necessary for the child to agree with something at the end. The best possibility is simply to have discussions with the child about other (sexual or not) problems, so that it can learn this and the adult can detect if there are such problems.
Another argument is the "advantage" of society in the fight of arguments. To allow the child to make an informed decision, it must have the possibility to compare arguments from above sides - for and against sex. Society has teached it's sex-negative opinions for years, and many people of trust for the child have contributed. In this situation, the pedophile has a moral right to give the child his own, sex-positive, arguments.
A discussion may be not a "fight of arguments" for and against sex, but also simply information of the child about sex the child has not get before. If this information is biased in the interest of the pedophile, this is a failure of the society which has not given the child the "correct" information.
The discussion may be also a clarification to avoid misunderstanding. If such a misunderstanding is possible, discussing it is necessary.